Long forbidden, dating has arrived in the ultra-conservative Gulf kingdom with some Saudis meeting and marrying without the help of relatives. Well-heeled millennials meet via Tinder, Snapchat, Twitter and Instagram. The pair finally met in person in Egypt, where gender mixing is more accepted than in Saudi Arabia, long dominated by a puritanical form of Islam that has been challenged recently by Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman’s push toward a more moderate interpretation of the religion. Because sex and romantic love remain highly controversial subjects in the kingdom, interviewees spoke to NBC News on condition of anonymity, and pseudonyms have been used. While there have been noticeable social changes recently, men and women who are not closely related still traditionally don’t mix, and some avoid even looking at an unrelated person of the opposite sex. Girls and boys are educated separately, and workplaces that employ women are nominally segregated. So meeting, dating and getting married can be a treacherous obstacle course. Secrecy is the norm, particularly when it comes to sex. Lulwa, 27, bridles at a deep-seated sexism in Saudi society that she says reduces women to their reproductive functions, even among some members of her liberal circle in which the genders mix and alcohol is sometimes served at parties. It is both a blessing and curse that Lulwa is not searching for a partner in her native Riyadh.
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The year-old professor exchanged resumes with prospective suitors — helped by a Muslim cleric-cum-matchmaker — until she was contacted by a long-lost acquaintance who also wanted to give contact-less dating a whirl. There was no hand holding or kissing. But Pujiartati saw it as a way to ditch dating that went nowhere and be a devout Muslim at the same time by avoiding pre-marital touching and sex.
A movement called Indonesia Tanpa Pacaran Indonesia without dating is blossoming in the Southeast Asian nation where people born from the mid-Nineties make up about one-quarter of its more than million people. The nuptials-focused group, which has a million followers on its Instagram page alone, targets this enormous Generation-Z audience largely through social media. Any pre-marital contact should be supervised and getting married younger is ideal, according to the group, which portrays pre-marital dating as a sinful product of Western decadence.
To get its message out, the group also sells branded products including hats, keychains and hijab head coverings worn by many women in Indonesia. With dozens in the audience, the year-old denounced dating and called on attendees to break up with their partners. One young man walked on stage and broke it off with his girlfriend over the phone, eliciting cheers and clapping. Among them is the tale of Muhammad Alvin Faiz, son of a prominent pro-polygamy cleric, who married his year-old wife, a Catholic convert to Islam, through a no-contact relationship.
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